Gratitude and the Meaning of Life

Deuteronomy 34:1-12

Today is the final installment of our sermon series, “Barriers to Gratitude.” Such barriers can affect our outlook on life, our interactions with others, and our life of faith. An attitude of gratitude opens us up to living lives that follow Jesus’ command to love, that allow us to know and feel God’s love and to recognize the gift of blessing even in the midst of chaos, pain, and challenges. To live a life of gratitude is to live in the joy and awareness of God’s grace.

The barrier we’ll talk about today is “disappointment”. We all experience some disappointments in life. You cannot go through life without knowing its sting. Even as you are sitting here today, it is very likely that some of you are sitting on a big disappoint in your personal or professional life.

The word disappointment means just what it sounds like – it means to have a previously scheduled appointment canceled, an expected opportunity erased, or a promise broken. For some of us, disappointment has come in the form of our favorite sports team underperforming – especially when we are sitting on season tickets.

I learned early in life to stay out of the living room if my dad’s beloved Yankees were disappointing his expectations for a pennant win. His disappointment could be loud and stormy. Disappointments like that are a dime a dozen and we can pass them off pretty easily.

But what happens when the disappointments go deeper – are even life altering in some cases?

Some of us have experienced the disappointment of unrequited love, or not getting into the school, college, or career field we dreamed of. Still deeper disappointments have been experienced by those of us who have endured the disappointment of a lost pregnancy or the inability to ever conceive the children we dreamed of; a devastating diagnosis for ourselves or for a loved one; or witnessing the suffering of a loved one.  

Uncertainties of life frequently throw each of us into the pool of disappointment at times, where we bob around, sometimes feeling as though we are sinking or drowning. And that’s exactly what happens to people whose resiliency fails them, or who lack the ability to draw on hope – and even gratitude - in times of trial and disappointment.

The story of Moses would seem to be the perfect example of extreme disappointment. One would think that Moses had earned the right to cross the river into the Promised Land. Yet here we have one-hundred-twenty-year-old Moses, the great prophet whom the Lord knew face to face, who had performed unequaled signs and wonders for the Lord. Yet, he was denied entry into the Promised Land. He led the people of Israel right up to the proverbial front door of that long-promised place, yet all he could do was view it from atop the peak of Mount Nebo.

Talk about disappointment!   

It is the nature of life, even sometimes the life of faith, that sometimes does not make sense. When this happens, it is only natural that disappointment follows. When we are disappointed, it is only natural that sometimes, we react by complaining, we experience bitterness, even anger. Hopefully, time, faith, and perspective give us the ability to return to attitudes of gratitude, but that doesn’t always happen. That is when disappointment becomes a barrier to knowing the deep and abiding gift of gratitude.  

Like Job, most people who have been through the wringer of life have a long list of disappointments and complaints against their maker. It’s hard to be grateful when the thing you most want and need and desire and pray for is taken away.

But there is also great power in those who see their own stories as a part of something greater. Scripture tells us that Moses knows in advance that his ministry will end just short of his intended destination, yet he spends his last breaths in blessing and praise of the same Lord who has passed that judgement on him.

So, how do we become like Moses? How do we live in gratitude even when our hearts have been broken and disappointments assail us? Experts in the field of psychology conclude the attitude of gratitude to be a choice that we make.

Viktor Frankl, for instance, was an Austrian neurologist and psychiatrist who, along with most of his family, was sent to concentration camps during World War II. It was during their years in those camps that Frankl’s mother, father, brother and wife all perished. The only person in his family to survive the Holocaust, aside from himself had been one sister who had emigrated to Australia.

From his observations and personal experience, Frankl developed theories that he later wrote, taught, and spoke about. In his best-selling book, Man’s Search for Meaning, Frankl wrote that people are primarily driven by a “striving to find one’s meaning in life.” It is this sense of meaning that helps people survive and even thrive following painful experiences. Can we do that? Can we make the choice to be grateful no matter what our circumstance?

About gratitude, Frankl wrote, “The last of human freedoms - the ability to choose one’s attitude, especially an attitude of gratitude in a given set of circumstances, especially in difficult circumstances.” Frankl considered gratitude to be a choice one makes in the face of adversity as well as blessing.

As people of faith, we don’t have to look far to find meaning in life. We have been entrusted with the message of the Gospel of Jesus Chris. We have the joy of knowing that no matter what might befall us in this life, nothing can separate us from the love of God known and experienced in Jesus Christ. We live each day knowing that we are created in the image of God for the purpose of sharing God’s love and compassion with the world. We live with the assurance that not only will God never let us go, but that God’s Holy Spirit is with us through every trial and joy, disappointment and success in life. Yet, sometimes, we forget.

In an age of instant gratification and convenience, we lose the understanding that there is a discipline to disappointment. There is a discipline to gratitude. It takes practice to react with gratitude and not resentment to the disappointments of life.

During a particularly sad and stressful time in my life, I really didn’t feel much gratitude. It was enough just to feel that I had survived each day. What made a difference to me was a friend, a person of faith, suggesting an exercise, though I didn’t know it at the time, that would give me gratitude practice. She suggest I take little red dots – the kind you find in office supply stores – and post them strategically around the domain of my existence – so: house, car, work space. Every time I saw a dot, I was to think of something I could be grateful for; to think of something positive –. And to say a short prayer of thanksgiving.

The idea was that even in the depth of our dark days, because of the love of Jesus, there is still light. Even when we are sad, there is something to be grateful for. We are in some way blessed. This is not to deny the fact that sometimes, life just stinks. But it is a way to retrain the brain to see not only the most obvious, negative stuff, but also to see the positive things in life, and to develop a healthy and spiritually grounded attitude of gratitude about them.

Look to the faith of Moses, best displayed as he sat alone with his God watching the horizon of his life’s work, feeling not resentment but grateful. What we all need is a little perspective – what is the grander story being told? What is the greater story of which we play a part?

Today, as we commemorate the 500^th anniversary of the Protestant Reformation, we remember that we are part of the story of faithful people who give thanks for the Word of God that comes new to us each day.

We are part of the story of the Church of Christ that, in gratitude for the life-giving blood of Christ on the Cross, gather each week to worship and praise our Lord.

We are Lutherans, focused on the grace of God, known through faith as the gift of the Holy Spirit and the mercy of Jesus Christ our Lord, the very Word of God.

We are the grateful recipients of God’s love, sent into the world to bring the healing love of Christ to our neighbor.

We are God’s children, redeemed for the sake of the Kingdom of God, filled with gratitude for God’s unerring love, acceptance, forgiveness, healing, and presence in the midst of our deepest disappointments.

We can rejoice and give thanks for our place in God’s story, in spite of disappointments we’ve faced along the way.

As Christians our sense of gratitude comes from a deep well of faith and hope given to us through baptism, reinforced by the Word of God and grown and nurtured through the sacraments. It is profound. It forms us in generosity. It encourages our efforts to respond to the blessings of God with our lives. It influences our sense of stewardship, citizenship, and everyday living.

In his book, On Fire, inspirational writer and speaker John O’Leary writes,

“Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow.”

May it be, that whether we are experiencing forest or desert, joy or sorrow, loss or gain, we might learn to be grateful, for the grace, mercy and love of Jesus that accompany us on the way.